Say What You Need to Say

“Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.” Ephesians 4:15
 
I know direct people can be harsh sometimes. Hearing something that is difficult to hear is never easy and can put further strain on a relationship. But people who care enough to point out when you are on the wrong path are a gift from God.
 
Yes, a gift.
 
Randall says what is on his mind when he first meets his father He intended it to be harsh, but instead it allows a new relationship blossom between the two. Kate tells Toby the hard things like she has to put herself and her goal to lose weight ahead of love and it results in Toby chasing after her on Christmas only to collapse and have heart surgery to fix the physical (and maybe the spiritual) aspects of his life. Rebecca and Jack say what they need to say and it results in an official separation between the two.
 
Sometimes the results of telling someone what they need to hear rather than what they want to hear is a loving gesture because it helps them get back on the right track. It is similar to a gardener that prunes his branches. In order for growth to occur, dead leaves and weeds must be clipped so it doesn’t impede the good fruit that will result. It is a gesture that affirms that the person is putting your wellbeing ahead of his/her own need to be liked and approved. Both of these ideas need to be present to speaking the truth.
 
I know I have had to speak the hard truth into other’s lives. Sometimes it results in a person becoming better and maturing in their spiritual walk as a result. Other times, I have lost relationships and friendships. It’s never easy to grieve the lost of a friendship after telling someone something difficult and it often comes at the cost of losing a friend. But the reward of watching someone become better because of the pruning needs to be done is priceless.